it is funny how u say those things, Garf. and the song u posted.
i was walking with peter around our neighbourhood one day and he asked me, "do u think u are attached to new york?" i think it was the day after we received my employment authorization document.
i was quiet for awhile; registering the question in my head. i looked up and see the empire state building in all its' glory, looming in the distance ahead of us. i picture myself leaving new york city, i imagine packing up the apartment, and i think of my life without all the new york things - both good and bad - that we've adapted to. i imagine looking at the new york city skyline from the window seat of an airplane. "would i miss it?" i asked myself.
maybe. but not much. my attachment to new york is mild; i'm attached to this apartment, the streets, neighbourhood. to put it simply, when i leave to go somewhere new, this sort of attachment is replicable. i'm sure in a few months time, i'd feel the same way about rotterdam. amsterdam. or wherever we will go to live. my attachment to kl on the other hand runs deeper than that. i'm attached emotionally to people - family, friends, pets. they're irreplaceable.
having said that, i disagree with just one bit in the song. the part when it goes, "i just want to go home". irregardless of my attachments, there is no way i'll ever "just want to go home...."
in fact, the lines are so blurred now that i often think, "what is home?" i think for now, home is where the heart is. it is no longer as simple as a geographic location.
today we went to see the 4th of july fireworks. i arrived last year a few days shy of independence day, full of hopes and promises. today i looked back and saw myself reading the girls' parting letter in the aircraft as i leave malaysia, tears streaming down my face. then i came online and looked at our blog, and realized that we've grown closer than ever. distance somehow worked it's miracle and strengthened our friendship. it is a wonderful feeling.
sunny day on pier at hudson river.
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